It's Been a Long Day....

...without you, my friend. These last few weeks I've had "See You Again" by Wiz Khalifa featuring Charlie Puth playing on repeat on my iPod. The song was penned in honor of the late Paul Walker as part of the Fast and Furious series but has been my soundtrack for running this summer.  I've been stumbling through my training for the City of Oaks marathon but have been blessed with multiple opportunities to visit with my family and friends in South Carolina, including Jamie's family.

Zachary and Jeremiah at Reedy River Falls  Park in Greenville, SC

I was able to visit with Jamie's mother at the beginning of July and again last week.  My second visit included my two sons, Zachary and Jeremiah.  We visited and the boys swam in the pool I once swam in with Jamie so many years ago.  The boys enjoyed the chance to swim on a hot afternoon and I enjoyed taking them to the home I spent several summers visiting.  At one point during our swim, I looked up to see Debra smiling at us and while it felt wonderful to see that smile, it left me torn.  In that moment, I felt guilty - Jamie should be here. She should be bringing her children to swim but that will never happen.

They say the ones we love never truly leave us and I believe that. Jamie continues to be present despite her passing.  The Jamie Kirk Hahn Foundation continues to do amazing work in her honor, giving back to the community of Raleigh she so loved. Her friends and family find ways to honor her through their words and actions. Memories come from the most random of places. Earlier this week, I watched 'Free Willy', a favorite film from my childhood and as I laughed at familiar scenes, I was hit with the memory of seeing it for the first time in theaters with Jamie.  We loved the film - a young boy forced to do community service at the marine park he trespassed upon strikes an unlikely friendship with a killer whale - and were determined to become marine biologists.  We even ended up attending a week-long marine biology camp just miles from Myrtle Beach, South Carolina.

Fast forward to this morning and our household chores.  With the summer soon ending, we have been working to clean and organize before the school year gets underway and this finds me going through several old boxes.  One box included a plain red folder filled with hand-written poems and photographs torn from magazines, a folder I hadn't seen in years and had forgotten I owned.  The creator? Jamie.  She wrote me these poems at the end of another wonderful summer before we would begin middle school, twenty years ago.  The poems are simple, but speak to the heart of who Jamie was; the first one:

Friends
They're important people,
Just like you.
They make the world a happier place,
With all the wonderful things they do.

Everyone needs one,
In good times and bad.
They make you happier,
Especially when you're sad.

They make you feel better,
When sick and in bed.
They send you a letter,
that makes you happier when read.

They always make you happier
In the end.
They're the most important people -
They're friends!

So, Jamie - like the song says, "It's been a long day, without you my friend and I'll tell you all about it when I see you again." You may be gone, but you're not forgotten. You're with me in every run and will be with me throughout my training MilesForJamie and my run in Raleigh in November.

"We've come a long way from where we began and I'll tell you all about it when I see you again."

A rare tech-free run...just me and the mile.